Weekend Update - April 24th

• Exposed nipples? Anal sex? Ohmygawd, what exactly is it that's causing all these earthquakes, volcanos, corrupt Republican politicians, etc.? Let us pose our query to the experts. Let us ask, say, Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi, a senior Iranian cleric, one of those gnarled, severe, crusted-over Muslims you should always turn to with the big questions about women, love and man's imminent downfall, because hoary old guys like him never lie or make s-- up just to maintain their power, authority and secret access to gay prostitutes and cocaine. Let's see what Sedighi says: "Many women who do not dress modestly... lead young men astray, corrupt their chastity and spread adultery in society, which (consequently) increases earthquakes." You guessed it, Mark Morford reports.


• Seen kids acting strange while hanging out at the mall lately? Think it's probably just drugs? Well, you might be right, although not exactly as you think. "Antipsychotics, which are being widely and irresponsibly prescribed for American children--mostly as chemical restraints--are shown to be causing irreparable harm," warned Vera Hassner Sharav, president of the Alliance for Human Research Protection, in a February 26, 2010 InfoMail. The use of powerful antipsychotics with privately insured children, aged 2 through 5 in the US, doubled between 1999 and 2007, according to a study of data on more than one million children with private health insurance in the January, 2010, "Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry." Click here for more.


• This story just keeps on getting more disgusting. I think, in retrospect, most of actually knew this was happening all along, but no one one knew what the hell to do about it. In late 2007, as the mortgage crisis gained momentum and many banks were suffering losses, Goldman Sachs executives traded e-mail messages saying that they would make “some serious money” betting against the housing markets. These people are truly evil, and most of them need to be stripped naked and thrown into a pit. 'Course that's just my opinion.


• Bad Hat's Idiot of the Week is former Vice President Dick (we-call-him-Dick) Cheney. Seems he talked the other day about the proudest moment in his storied political career. Remember when he told Patrick Leahey to "go f**k yourself"? "You'd be surprised how many people liked that," Cheney told conservative comedian and radio host Dennis Miller Thursday. "That's sort of the best thing I ever did." And you know what, we actually agree with him. What a putz.


• Remember that group that sent all the Governors letters telling them to step down in three days or be removed from office? An April Fool's prank or a group of fools? It would appear the latter. They call themselves The Guardians of the Free Republic, or some such nonsense, and if you want a little taste of what drives the "Tea Party" people into a frothy frenzy, check out this web site. I figure it's a bunch of beer-swilling over weight pig-brained bigoted Southern Baptists who can't stand the idea of a black President. 'Course, I may be wrong.